You know you drive an MB jalopy when...


You know you drive an MB jalopy when...



...you park it in any old carpark risking car park dents and shopping
trolley mishaps. In fact, you even push trolleys out of the way with it. ...you carelessly litter in it.
...the electric sunroof needs help to open and close.
...the oil you religiously put in the engine reappears as dirty spots on your driveway AND as smoke from your exhaust.
...there is so much rust in the body that restoration is not an option.
...you smoke in it.
...you wash it infrequently or, better still, you let nature wash it for you.
...the top end of the motor rattles badly.
...the paint is peeling.
...the amount of fuel it uses seems excessive.
...friends don't really want to go for a ride with you.
...candles would be more effective than the headlights.
...it leaks water into the cabin.
...temporary fixes end up permanent.
...the stated performance figures for it seem more than optimistic.
...the odometer stopped working so you either didn't worry about it or you fixed the odometer and reset it to 00000.0
...it takes 2 or 3 seconds for the transmission to engage.
...other drivers get out of your way in carparks and erratically overtake you on the street.
...you let other people drive it.
...it's an effort to spin the rear wheels on gravel.
....You use your left hand to signal for left hand turns, and your passengers right hand for right hand turns ....If no passenger present for right signal use the "Just do it" procedure
....Your (formerly power) windows are supported on 2 by 4s
....You use your hand to wipe the windshield
....In winter the heater blows warm, not hot, air
....In summer AC blows warm, not cold, air
....In case of emergency you use the breaks squek as your horn

........but, having said all that......

...it still goes 100MPH.
...it starts every time.
...it has never failed utterly.
...it's as smooth as silk to drive.
...comprehensive insurance is not necessary.
...it looks good.
...the seats are comfortable.
...it only cost $1,000 (or less).

and you think it's a great car and you like driving it.

Michael Oakes, Tomasz







Ref: Frank Mallory's database and https://mercedes-benz-publicarchive.com